After so many years of painting, I know that emotions inside of me take on a life of their own and I am usually the last to know how they will present themselves in my work. Painting and every art form in it's purest sense, is a leaving of self and ego behind, and allowing the soul to come through the medium you're working with. It can truly be a mystical experience, as anyone who dives into the creative process knows. You lose track of time, forget to eat- all that matters is your art.
Creating art- whatever it may be- takes caring more about your growth as an artist than protecting yourself. Risking failure, and abject falling on your face is part of the deal. Playing, experimentation and problem solving are about the process- And that's where the nuggets of beauty are truly found. A final product you and everyone else loves is wonderful, but it doesn't have as much to do with being an artist as the process does. If we have only perfection in mind, it's easy to lose sight of the process and the creativity, which is where the life of a painting lives and grows. The real work and learning take place between your soul and your paintbrush/instrument/pen/camera, etc.
In the end, in both life and art, what you're left with is a work that is all your own, for better or worse. Full of the inspiration, mistakes, passion, rage, hope and love you put into it. Taking part in the creative process, no matter what medium- is a reflection of life in many ways.
There are many gifts in the imperfections - in both art and life. Whatever our creative process is, it will help us become more self-actualized, expand our spiritual life, believe in ourselves, and experience joy and fulfillment. It can do all of that and more, if we will only allow it.
It takes forgiveness, guts, and grace to do a painting, or life, well. And the good and bad news is that it's all up to you.